evergreen.

yesterday was a terrible day. i mean, lots of things happened, and they weren't all bad, but my overall feeling was terrible.

tuesday night was wonderful. tyler and i were feeling lazy, and i said i wanted pasta for dinner. we went to boston pizza, because i happened to remember that tuesday is pasta tuesday! we sat up by the bar because tyler was hoping they would play the pay per view canucks game. they didn't. but they showed high lights. it was nice. i was reminded why i'm so glad i don't work there anymore - families. i HATE serving families with small children. i just find random children so irritating. and the way most stupid parents talk to their stupid kids just grates on my nerves. i know lots of parents and kids who don't annoy me. why those ones do, i have no idea. why they seat families with small children in the bar area, i also don't know. but i wish they wouldn't. i then started thinking about why i'm glad i don't work there. perfect example: WALK INS OF 20 OR MORE. it happens on a nightly basis there. my jobs right now are fantastic. i'm glad.

we were planning on going over to trystan's, but when we finished dinner it was still a half hour before when trystan and i had discussed. i told tyler when we were leaving the house that it was too early... but he's a keener and is always early because he gives himself a half hour to drive places from our house, when it only in fact takes 15 mins. its funny. predictable with him, actually. so he said he had an idea and started driving. told me we were going to kelowna. i laughed. i knew exactly where we were going. now, i have always been a fan of driving in no particular direction, and sitting in places with a nice view to talk for hours, but tyler and i have never done that. he doesn't like driving without a destination just for something to do - it wastes gas. which is true. and we just haven't sat and talked ever for some reason. so, he drove up to the kal lake lookout which is REALLY pretty at night. all the lights around the lake. you can look over the city. it wasn't quite dark yet, so you can still see the mountains. there were some small low clouds, and some snow up at the top the mountains. i was so happy. just sitting there in the truck, i couldn't help but smile. it was one of those perfect moments. we sat and enjoyed some moments together, talked about things, and before i knew it, got a text from trystan saying he was done dinner and we could come over.

we hung out with trystan and the boys played mario on the wii, until finally joe and erin showed up. we watched zombieland on blu ray. trystan hasn't shut up about how much better blu ray is and wanting to show me for weeks now. so i finally saw it... and to be honest, it was clearer i guess? but i don't notice enough to buy a blu ray player and replace my entire dvd collection with blu ray. haha. we left after the movie, and came home and went to bed. it was around 10? past tyler's bed time. i got in bed first, and of course tyler didn't get the cats out of the bedroom before turning the light off and getting in bed. if the cats can come in, tyler wakes up and gets soooo mad that they keep trying to sleep right on top of him... so we lock them out usually. i bribed him to do it with a promise to make him breakfast before work the next morning.

when wednesday morning came, tyler pressed snooze till 6:30, and he has to leave at 6:45. there wasn't time for me to make breakfast and him eat it before he left. he told me he didn't want me to anyway, and to go back to sleep. so i did. he came to say goodbye right before he left, like he always does. and that was when i remembered that i had to take the car in at 9. so i got up and showered and got ready, and tried to find someone to meet me for coffee or something because i knew i had to kill most of the day downtown. no one was available, so i brought my book. i dropped the car off, and walked downtown. sat in my favourite coffee shop in my favourite little corner in the window and read my book for like 2 hours until the tattoo shop my friend works at opened. right before i left the coffee shop, i got a text from tyler... he says that he might have to go work up north for 6 MONTHS starting in may. that means, no camping this summer. no trips. no nothing. it means i will be alone for 6 months. instantly, i wanted to cry, but held it back because well... i was in a public place.

i walked down to freedom where my friend darcy works. told him about it. worked very hard not to cry. sent my friend gill a text to try and convince her to move here and live in our spare room for the summer. no cigar. i was just sort of bummed, but hung out with darcy all day in between piercings he had to do, talked about ideas that he can tattoo on my leg. so far we have an old style mixer, a rolling pin and cookie cutters, and a sewing machine. i'm pretty excited about it. tyler texted me again at some point through the afternoon and told me the car was going to cost way more, twice what we thought, so he had to transfer money from our savings too to pay for it. agh. frustrating. and now i knew he was going to be stressed about money. he came to get me early, at like 2:30, and we went home.

we got home, and i cried, and he felt bad. i know why working up north would be good. he will make more money. and the whole reason is because there isn't enough work around here right now, so his step dad is trying to get the contract to do this monastery in yellowknife or something? and it would be plumbing... so tyler would be plumbing instead of what he normally does. he would get time off periodically to come home. but i get sad when our schedules are opposite and i don't get to hang out with him for 3 days. and we still live in the same house. i will go insane. so lonely.

and now that he is gone to work, its all i can think about. i am gonna go read. i'm sad again. its silly... nothing is even for sure yet. agh.