lean on me.

it has been far far far too long since i wrote a blog! YIKES! just so much happening right now, plus we don't actually have internet at home currently. not until the 8th. tyler was TOO on the ball planning to get the cable hooked up at our new place, and we dropped the ball and forgot in the end. haha. he just wanted to get it done too early, as per usual with him. oh well. its kind of nice... not that i would have had time to sit around and use the internet in the last few weeks anyway.

i've been working like crazy, and of course, moving. we got our bed and other essentials moved on tuesday, and have been sleeping at the new house since. but there was a long process after that of moving the rest of the stuff, doing a dump run to get rid of all the garbage, and of course CLEANING. which i was stressing and dreading for a while before that (but erin came to help and it was actually quite painless). on top of all that, i am mc'ing this talent contest called our kids have talent, which i am very nervous about. there is a lot more work than i expected that has to go into it from me. lots of my free time. i have to do interviews with the contestants on my show. i have done 8 of them between today and yesterday. and the real kicker... is i also got sick and have been for the last week or so. it SUCKS. i keep coughing now, and losing my voice (which isn't so good when both of my jobs include a lot of talking!).

i have a killer headache, and i don't really feel like writing a whole lot right now.

soon enough i'll have internet at home again.

singles awareness day.

i am usually very cynical about valentine's day. i always thought it hilarious to refer to it as singles awareness day. i think i heard it originally from my friend tenille, but it always stuck with me. when i worked here at the station before, cole and i made a big joke out of it and how i was bitter and alone... i wasn't even single. but it was funny. until someone called in and suggested that cole and i date... he didn't think that was so funny and dropped the whole thing. which i thought was even funnier.

i've been talking to sarah a lot. its nice. nice to have her back in my life. i'm sure most of you who read my blog know what it is like to reconnect with your sister. haha. we've been talking so much about families, and like laura said, it is sooo interesting. interesting to look at old pictures of both her and me, and norm, and see likeness in her 3 kids. her boy really does look a lot like norm, its weird. i got really nostalgic (as if any of you didn't notice) and went through the entire box of old pictures i have. its a pretty big box. i took pictures of pictures, so they quality isn't fantastic. but you get the idea. i need to get some photo albums and actually sort through them properly. a lot of them have been wrecked over the years in that box. not to mention the box is all but completely falling apart. you know what i did find though, in all those piles and piles of old pictures. SLANTED EYES. like clarke eyes. but on my dad's side too. how did i avoid those? really... its quite amazing.

i'm really excited for the day that i finally get to meet my nieces and nephew. sarah sends me pictures of them sometimes on my cell phone, and they look like fantastic kids. lots of energy. i want to really get a chance to be an aunt to them.

the ad for the car is going in the paper on sunday, according to dean. so we'll see what happens with that. tyler is now having cold feet about selling it and thinking we might be better off hanging on to it. i don't know. i figure if it sells, it sells. if not, then we keep it for a while. i have a lot of other things going on... i don't even want to think about it, really. i am working both jobs tomorrow. and apparently last year valentines day was ridiculously busy at the pub. i'm really not looking forward to it. monday is my staff review with the boss at the pub. i have been told by some of the other girls not to expect it to be anything good. i am now expecting to be told i am doing a mediocre job and i really need to improve on everything if i want to keep my job... which stresses me out. and that's what i left my last job for! tuesday is interviews for shaw cable for the our kids have talent competition. i am being interviewed, as well as having pictures taken with the top 10. and there is a hockey game on either tuesday or wednesday night that i have to do... so... busy busy busy. and then i work thursday and friday nights. work day at the pub next saturday, and night here. followed by sunday at the pub. the next week is just really not looking that great...

olympics are here. and everyone keeps talking about it. i'm sick of it already. tyler wants to watch some of it, and i'm just NOT interested. it makes me angry. the opening ceremonies were on at the pub last night when i was working. and it was just a gross display of a disgusting waste of money. like... honestly.... consider all the budget cuts that have been made to the arts over the last 2 or 3 years. health care. social programs. ALL so we can put on a big show for the olympics that will last 17 days, and then we have a few decades of debt to follow so to pay it all off. its sad. i am SO glad i am not living in vancouver right now. the cost of living is ridiculous. there are probably just so many MORE people around. far too many people for my liking.

i like living in the okanagan.

today was so warm and sunny and wonderful... i am really just hoping for spring so i can get my bike in top condition and RIDE. and get my spare bike running. and have other people ride with me.

tyler is bringing me coffee so i can make it through the rest of my night here! WOO!!

you were meant for me.

jewel. i loved this album when it came out. the video for this song was so weird. it was her playing guitar and singing in a public washroom with fake green vines hanging on the walls and stuff. so weird. sometimes i find some comfort in 90's pop hits while i'm at work. i know all the words. its fun to sing along. makes me feel good when i sing along.

patrick and i had a little talk when i started. saturdays he does his specialty show up until i go on air. the saturday kiss classics. its a good show, lots of awesome oldies. he said he listened to the cd's i gave him, and there were a lot of talented artists out there. he liked them. he brought up on concern of his about my idea of wanting a show to play the music i like - he said that the problem with it was that when i leave, it ends? we spend all this time, and the station's money, building up and audience for it... and then when i decide to move away or whatever, its over. because the entire idea for the show is based off my passion for this kind of thing. i reassured him that i wasn't going anywhere. tyler and i are working towards buying a house. i do believe i am in vernon for the long haul. he responded with a kind of surprised, 'oh, well thats good to know.' i think it helps my chances a bit. he said it was far fetched still... but the responses i am getting about it now is a little more willing. i am working on my way in there. inch by inch. just like i planned. i feel like there should be an evil laugh inserted here. haha.

tyler and i managed to get rid of one ugly free couch and chair today. it was awesome. tyler put them on craigslist and we got an email the next day... guy came and got it. nice big empty space in our living room now. lovely result. we have been sorting and throwing things away and giving things away the last week. it always feels good when you move and sort through all your belongings and get rid of the excess. i love getting rid of clutter. it has finally given me purpose to organize through my sewing room and put everything away in the dresser i have for my fabric and notions and everything. not to mention tyler has shoved everything that he didn't want to look at in my "sewing" room. it was more of a random junk room. never got fully organized and put away. oh well. i did manage to talk him into getting rid of most of the stuff he shoved in there (including his little fake christmas tree... WOO!). my mom came by to pick up a touque that she sold, but tyler had taken. she left with a garbage bag full of clothes to be sorted through, a heating pad, a tv, bag of old halloween costumes, and i'm sure a few other random things. tyler joked about how mad dean would be at us for her coming home with more STUFF. haha. he is always so funny about all the stuff my mom gets from random places. she is RESOURCEFUL. can use anything for anything. its cool. now we just have an extra rockband drum set and mic for xbox 360, a falling apart couch that needs to go to the dump, an extra queen size bed, and a box of random garbage we have collected. oh yes, i also have two really old bikes i'm trying to sell. they need a little love, but they are both very cute! i'm hoping to make a bit of cash off them, considering bikes are so damn trendy right now.

our new place is much smaller... so tyler has no excuse to hang on to random CRAP. i like it. simplify our life. much easier to be neat and tidy. otherwise i start to feel like my life is falling apart around me. i can't handle having a disastrous living situation. starts to just stress me out and eat away at me. agh. no good. i think that's why i am soooo excited to move.

i also enjoy getting rid of all the crappy stuff we have. i sort of decided that we're pretty rooted here. the next time we move, we both want it to be into a house that we buy. no more random moving all the time. so its time to start acquiring some stuff that we actually like. we're buying tyler's sister's couch off her (it has been sitting in their garage for the last 6 months). its a beautiful large sectional, beige, microfibre and so soft and comfy. i also want to invest in a nice kitchen table. something quality that is solid wood. something i like. and i am keeping an eye out for a cute little antique writing desk or something for my typewriter. and i found a wicked desk at ikea (i was looking online, as we don't have one around here). it is a little cube shelf, with a desk that comes out of it. so i can keep all my random supplies on the shelf, and use the desk part for my sewing machine!! all in due time...

we also need to sell the car. we paid our $1500 repair bill... and now just want to be rid of it. it's now in fantastic condition. and its a good car. tyler just knows how much i HATE driving it, and he doesn't want to deal with it anymore. i'll ride my bike for the summer, and we'll find something else in the fall. i'm excited to get riding my bike again. i miss it. that feeling of the wind just flowing past you... like flying. i feel so free. mmmmmm.... i can't wait for summer. the okanagan is so pretty in the spring and summer. such a wonderful place to live.

my bicycle.

amy inspired me to share some pictures of my bicycle. i finally got out there and took some today.

evergreen.

yesterday was a terrible day. i mean, lots of things happened, and they weren't all bad, but my overall feeling was terrible.

tuesday night was wonderful. tyler and i were feeling lazy, and i said i wanted pasta for dinner. we went to boston pizza, because i happened to remember that tuesday is pasta tuesday! we sat up by the bar because tyler was hoping they would play the pay per view canucks game. they didn't. but they showed high lights. it was nice. i was reminded why i'm so glad i don't work there anymore - families. i HATE serving families with small children. i just find random children so irritating. and the way most stupid parents talk to their stupid kids just grates on my nerves. i know lots of parents and kids who don't annoy me. why those ones do, i have no idea. why they seat families with small children in the bar area, i also don't know. but i wish they wouldn't. i then started thinking about why i'm glad i don't work there. perfect example: WALK INS OF 20 OR MORE. it happens on a nightly basis there. my jobs right now are fantastic. i'm glad.

we were planning on going over to trystan's, but when we finished dinner it was still a half hour before when trystan and i had discussed. i told tyler when we were leaving the house that it was too early... but he's a keener and is always early because he gives himself a half hour to drive places from our house, when it only in fact takes 15 mins. its funny. predictable with him, actually. so he said he had an idea and started driving. told me we were going to kelowna. i laughed. i knew exactly where we were going. now, i have always been a fan of driving in no particular direction, and sitting in places with a nice view to talk for hours, but tyler and i have never done that. he doesn't like driving without a destination just for something to do - it wastes gas. which is true. and we just haven't sat and talked ever for some reason. so, he drove up to the kal lake lookout which is REALLY pretty at night. all the lights around the lake. you can look over the city. it wasn't quite dark yet, so you can still see the mountains. there were some small low clouds, and some snow up at the top the mountains. i was so happy. just sitting there in the truck, i couldn't help but smile. it was one of those perfect moments. we sat and enjoyed some moments together, talked about things, and before i knew it, got a text from trystan saying he was done dinner and we could come over.

we hung out with trystan and the boys played mario on the wii, until finally joe and erin showed up. we watched zombieland on blu ray. trystan hasn't shut up about how much better blu ray is and wanting to show me for weeks now. so i finally saw it... and to be honest, it was clearer i guess? but i don't notice enough to buy a blu ray player and replace my entire dvd collection with blu ray. haha. we left after the movie, and came home and went to bed. it was around 10? past tyler's bed time. i got in bed first, and of course tyler didn't get the cats out of the bedroom before turning the light off and getting in bed. if the cats can come in, tyler wakes up and gets soooo mad that they keep trying to sleep right on top of him... so we lock them out usually. i bribed him to do it with a promise to make him breakfast before work the next morning.

when wednesday morning came, tyler pressed snooze till 6:30, and he has to leave at 6:45. there wasn't time for me to make breakfast and him eat it before he left. he told me he didn't want me to anyway, and to go back to sleep. so i did. he came to say goodbye right before he left, like he always does. and that was when i remembered that i had to take the car in at 9. so i got up and showered and got ready, and tried to find someone to meet me for coffee or something because i knew i had to kill most of the day downtown. no one was available, so i brought my book. i dropped the car off, and walked downtown. sat in my favourite coffee shop in my favourite little corner in the window and read my book for like 2 hours until the tattoo shop my friend works at opened. right before i left the coffee shop, i got a text from tyler... he says that he might have to go work up north for 6 MONTHS starting in may. that means, no camping this summer. no trips. no nothing. it means i will be alone for 6 months. instantly, i wanted to cry, but held it back because well... i was in a public place.

i walked down to freedom where my friend darcy works. told him about it. worked very hard not to cry. sent my friend gill a text to try and convince her to move here and live in our spare room for the summer. no cigar. i was just sort of bummed, but hung out with darcy all day in between piercings he had to do, talked about ideas that he can tattoo on my leg. so far we have an old style mixer, a rolling pin and cookie cutters, and a sewing machine. i'm pretty excited about it. tyler texted me again at some point through the afternoon and told me the car was going to cost way more, twice what we thought, so he had to transfer money from our savings too to pay for it. agh. frustrating. and now i knew he was going to be stressed about money. he came to get me early, at like 2:30, and we went home.

we got home, and i cried, and he felt bad. i know why working up north would be good. he will make more money. and the whole reason is because there isn't enough work around here right now, so his step dad is trying to get the contract to do this monastery in yellowknife or something? and it would be plumbing... so tyler would be plumbing instead of what he normally does. he would get time off periodically to come home. but i get sad when our schedules are opposite and i don't get to hang out with him for 3 days. and we still live in the same house. i will go insane. so lonely.

and now that he is gone to work, its all i can think about. i am gonna go read. i'm sad again. its silly... nothing is even for sure yet. agh.

the sporting life.

i love the decemberists. so into it right now.

tyler ordered me a t-shirt online a little while ago (feels like forever ago) from europe. it has a lucky cat on it!!!! i was really excited. i thought it warranted a picture. a wonderfully awkward awful picture.

thats about all i have to report today. i have to go meet trystan for lunch! yaaay! haha.

actually that's a lie. i had to take the car in yesterday because it was making this sound when i turned really sharp. we figured it was something that's no big deal. BUT, turns out its the steering system that is gone. it's going to cost us over $600 to fix it. tyler has some savings he is going to use to fix it, and then we're selling the car. YAAAY! no more old person luxury vehicle for me. i HATE that car. so then we'll be a one car household probably until next fall. then we're gonna get something i actually like driving. something small. something with a manual transmission. i'm very very very very excited about this. i was going to ride my bike all summer anyway, so i guess it wasn't a bad time for this to happen. tyler's step brother, brad, used to detail cars. so we're just going to pay him to clean it and make it look nice. and once we get all this stuff fixed, it will be in great condition. i just hate it. and tyler doesn't want to keep it.

THAT is about all i have to report i think. taking the car in tomorrow. should be a really boring day off.

january. 2010. music. love.

always say that i really like the playlist... because that's why i choose the songs. i really really like them. this month's actually includes a song i heard ON THE RADIO AT WORK... that's right, adult contemporary top 40. go figure.

1. the sunparlour players - pacifist's anthem
2. final fantasy - the cn tower belongs to the dead
3. viva voce - mixtape=love
4. land of talk - its okay
5. blue rodeo - lost together
6. the weakerthans - reconstruction site
7. band of horses - the general specific
8. the decemberists - yankee bayonet (i will be home then)
9. the devil makes three - the bullet
10. taken by trees - my boys
11. chad vangaalen - bones of man
12. iggy and the stooges - gimme danger
13. land of talk - troubled
14. the notwist - consequence
15. cat power - end of the street
16. taken by trees - watch the waves
17. land of talk - sea foam


thought i would post this up here again. check 'em out! enjoy.